It's not even the actual evening of NYE and I'm feeling so sooooo sad about 2014 ending. It really has been a beyond wonderful year for me and to leave the dream-like experiences I've had with the people I never thought I'd have met over these past 12 months is harder than my heart can admit.
I really do wish I could turn back the clock to last January and do everything over again. I wouldn't trade what I did and went through this year for anything. If 2015 is half as good as 2014 was, then I will be very content with my life.
I won't be surprised if I end up having a small breakdown tonight because the sad emotions will be hard to hold back. I'm not looking forward to ending the holiday season or starting back my second semester of college... I just want it to be Christmas vacation forever! After this everything will be about hard classes and grades to obtain, busy schedules to work around, no European Christmas markets or abroad friends to see anytime soon, and of course, losing a bit of weight for the spring and the summer. I don't know how I'm even going to begin doing that... Let alone be successful. Oh, the horrible reminders...
Nostalgia and melancholy have never felt more real than they do right now. Life will go on, I know, and many other wonderful things will happen this next year, just as they did for this past one. I guess I'll just have to keep reminding myself that there will always be something else wonderful in life to take the place of the cool things that are now long gone.
I hope my wishes for the new year are reflected as they are in the lyrics of Kevin Ross's song "This is My Wish":
"Fill the air with joyful noise,
Ring the bell and raise your voice,
Let there be peace on Earth,
Let there be peace on Earth,
Lift your light, let it shine,
Shine, shine, shine
Let every voice be heard,
Let there be peace on Earth."
We'll see how this all goes...